Make a Wish and Have it Corrupted

How to play is simple: Make a wish and the next person will grant it, but at a terrible, horrible, evil price! Once the wish is granted, the person puts their wish underneath it.

Example wrote:
*Sora Posts*
Sora: I wish I wasn't short

*Al Posts*
Riku: Granted. You're tall, but now you're so fat, you can't even swing the Keyblade.

Riku: I wish I had a pony

The rules:
1. PG-13! Follow the Rules!
2. Make sure to grant the person above you's wish before you make your own.
3. Have fun!

I wish I had a keyblade *pout*

Granted. It's an evil Keyblade that possesses you and makes you kill everyone, including everyone at Square Enix.

I wish for more members on the site. ^_^

Granted but they are only evil Organization members.

I wish I had some candy...now.

Granted. They're a razor in it.

I wish for brownies...

Granted. You will meet a man with a surfer accent who is 40 going on 15. You will have adorably naive children.

I wish for Xemnas' hair.

Granted. But its got bubblegum in the oddest of places and was cut(courtesy of No. IX) leaving you with the strangest hair known to man on this side of the moon.

I wish Saix would just confess already!~

Granted. The noises resulting from said confession keep you up at night.

I wish I had heard the confession sooner. (lol)

Granted. But I'm going to have to get a restraining order on you. O.o

I wish someone else would add to this chain.

Granted. I came in and deleted all your posts.

I wish for more free time.

Granted. The world is consumed by darkness, so now the free time is pointless.

I wish for ENGR assignments to make sense.

Granted. Your brain explodes from forbidden knowledge.

I wish I could make sense of my programming.

Granted. Except for your program becomes self-aware and declares war on humanity.

I wish I was a better writer.

Granted. You're so good that Stephanie Meyer feels threatened and sicks her sparkling vampires on you.

I wish for dessert. ^_^ How I adore sweets.

I'm going to grant both b/c they were posted for the same wish.

Demyx: Granted but he ALSO puts a restraining order on you

Destiny: Granted, but it is stolen by L.

I wish I could give epic speeches....

Granted. But no one listens to you.

I wish I could figure out how to get the site to tell you someone beat you to the punch in posting. >_<

Granted. Just look for my handsome face. LOL!

I wish I had anime club TODAY!

Granted. We watch only hetero stuff.

I wish to know who dies next in Umineko.

Granted. You find out that it was just a plot to kill you.

I wish for no homework for once.

Granted. But instead you get a lot of classwork that requires a lot of calculating.

I wish for breakfast. *hasn't eaten yet*

Granted. It's overcooked brussle sprouts and brocolli.

I wish I had a dragon like Toothless.